to be one of a kind.
To know that your lips could trace my whole self.
Shimmy all the way down my spine,
taking in each curve and every chill
as you prompt them to arise.
Even taste my skin in all the places you desire,
as you tune into each moan
like an artist stroking a captivating scene.
& be very thorough
maybe do me over twice
you will never find
a collection of unicity
quite like mine.
I’ve been in ‘love’ before,
kissed the face of the devil
and laid next to him before.
Watched as he lose his mind
and slowly infect mine
as he searches for another casualty.
I’ve been in ‘love’ before
even picked myself up off the floor
and left ‘love’ at the door, before.
So when you ask if love is worth fighting for
I’d have to say
No love is worth the wage
if it preys upon your ecstasy.
In my mind,
you’ll miss me.
Maybe to the point of wondering if most the things you wanted
we’re simply right in front of your face.
But maybe, it’s just better if I think this way.
Because when my thoughts lead to you,
there is no safe place.
I’d slip into the most alluring thing I own,
to strut around the house until you make it home.
What power this provides me,
to seduce your entirety,
as your hungry eyes devour each move,
that’s what excites me.
Its the way it leaves you breathless and down on your knees.
of just one look,
& you’re the one begging to eat me.
& I think you should know I never meant to leave you behind
But it’s just what happens when you enter into a new state of mind,
and we no longer align.
It’s the part of growing I’ve learned to accept
Because if I don’t reach for the best version of me
Then I would be the one left aside.
if you could see through my eyes
would you still invite this kinda of pain
and even sew it back in place
just to break every other day.
would you convince yourself that happiness will appear
and that if you mend him, he will somehow save you along the way
would you still think loneliness is cured by connection,
so connecting with every soul,
even if every soul doesnt connect with you.
if you could see through my eyes
you’d see you were never lonely until you
thought you needed something more
if you could see through my eyes, you’d know how much you were loved
and I think you’d feel whole.
if my love was present in every dimension,
laying patiently with each universe,
then I would set it all free
shattering it at your toes
in every forrest
so that it can reach up for the trees
and wait for you to dance in it’s breeze
your obsessed with this being
that doesnt exist,
and its painting images in your mind,
saying things like
“you can fix me”.
but crafting is such a tricky thing
when your dipping your hands into dirty waters.
and your hoping that maybe, i’ll take notice
of all these strokes
filling my canvas
but all i see is
a true masterpiece that already exists inside of me
such a raw design
you could never recreate its complexity
could you imagine
living in a world where we all spoke our minds freely
and how many would choose to speak vulgarly
to accept the self destruction
that helps feed the corruption
of the same entities that steal from you daily
my pain knows me by name
and I visit it in my own little way.
Grasping onto it
laying with it
even kissing it
as it teaches me to grow in new ways
I visit it
from time to time
so that it knows it doesn’t have to visit me